Cuttlefish Encounters

I recently had a conversation with some female friends over the weekend, and tried to explain to them the "universal" things men desire in women. I shared with them a partial list, but not much of a detailed explanation. I know that I am a helpless romantic and looks at the world through distorted lenses. So, let me preface this by saying these are my thoughts and mine alone, but I sincerely believe that the vast majority of men the world over think in these terms. Even if you look back on those failed relationships in your life (excluding where guys cheated or mistreated you - you are far better off without those jerks), you might recognize some areas where you can improve existing or future relationships. This is my Valentine's wish for you all.

Fit into their partner's life

Whether it is real or imagined, the one instinct men possess is knowing how he fits into a woman's life. If she makes time for everything else but him, the relationship is almost certainly doomed for failure. Allow him to be a part of your life and he in turn will do the same for you (even if your life is super busy). The implication is if there is no time or effort  made for us being together, then our relationship isn't much of a priority.

Appreciation

I cannot stress this enough. Your partner needs to know that he is appreciated. Smile a little more when he is around, whisper encouraging words, hug him when he gets home. I know this all sounds simple, but you might truly be surprised by how much the little things pay off. If he sees that you can appreciate the little things he does, typically the more he wants to do for you. We are born with a genetic disposition to please women. If he has been mowing the lawn all day, don't be afraid of making him some iced tea or lemonade.

Inspiration

Typically, we fall head over heels for women that inspire us. So if you don't know how to inspire someone, read everything you can about Michelle Obama's life, and try to replicate it. :) President Obama didn't get to where he is without her. Be the reason he wakes up in the morning, the reason he hears beautiful melodies when he thinks of you, the reason he exists.

Chemistry & passion

If Einstein were to create a formula for long lasting relationships, he would have to include these two components. Chemistry - the characteristic that holds two objects together as though they were one such as magnetism. Passion - the raw energy produced by two things drawn together.

There has to be the greatest degree of honesty

If there is something he needs to hear from you (make sure it is you bearing the news). The reverse is also true. Your husband/mate/partner needs to know that he can come to you with absolutely anything (especially if he has made a mistake). This is the hardest thing to do for most men since we generally do not communicate as much or as well as women. We do not like exposing our flaws.

Loyalty

One of the greatest characteristics men admire most is loyalty. I think that is literally why so many men own dogs. We like knowing that through thick and thin, that someone has your back. When you accept a guy as your partner, you should also accept the "us against the world" mentality that goes along with it.

Confidentiality & Trustworthiness are must haves 

What is said between the two of you in confidence (be it good/bad), should remain that way. I certainly wouldn't want my wife (if I were married) telling the world we won the lottery. Your most intimate secrets/arguments/etc posted online will only exacerbate any problems you may have between you. If you need a third (unbiased/impartial) party, seek professional counseling. Everything is not meant to be blogged about, tweeted, or posted to Facebook. There is this little thing called discretion (which most high schoolers don't know) that no social network seems to promote at all. If you must share thoughts or news to others not involved in a relationship, as a courtesy - clear it with those in the relationship first.

Show respect

I don't know when it became fashionable to throw out expletives in general conversations (even among strangers). I probably missed that memo, but the impression that it departs on most rational people is that (at a minimum), they can't control their speech. Respect is earned not given, and surprisingly we all don't think it's cool or mature to hear words thrown about like that randomly.

Be supportive

I honestly believe (at least to a certain extent) that our relationships are like investments. Typically, the more you put in over time, the more you get in return. 

Nurturing 

No man (let me stress this once again, no man) wants to be with a woman who is uncaring and shows no maternal instincts whatsoever. 

Willingness to meet halfway

Halfway as I am defining it does not mean 50/50. It means being flexible and empathetic to each others plight and emotions. Hopefully, on most days it is 50/50, but some days it may mean 30/70 or 80/20. It just depends on the circumstances. Life ebbs and flows with both good and bad, and both parties need to be mature enough to handle that if they are going to make the relationship work.

Beauty

Not saying you have to look like Paula Patton, Gabrielle Union, Meagan Good, or sing like Toni Braxton (although that never hurts) just know your strengths and weaknesses. We (those generally 30 or more) actually aren't looking for the perfect physical specimen of a woman, just one that we can love and adore. Believe it or not, women actually place more emphasis on their looks than do men. We do not like fake anything, just take care of the attributes God has given you. Even women with extraordinary physical attributes can carry themselves with humility (that really turns a guys head, those are the ones we marry). Every woman is not a fashion model or iconic actress (they all can't be Kelly Rowland/Ananda Lewis or it would drive us men insane), but practically anyone can exercise and carry themselves with dignity and class. I know lots with purely stunning looks, but some of their attitudes are so atrocious that I would not encourage anyone to ask them out. Your demeanor says volumes about the person you are, and men actually observe this. 

One of the most incredible I find about the web is the many free resources that are available to just about anyone that has access to it. Not only is it the democratization of information, but it is quickly becoming the tool of choice for many artisans. Whether you are a writer, astro physicist, brick layer, or recording artist. A plethora of free (or nearly free) are available for you to hone your craft or design your next masterpiece.

Let’s say you’re a photographer, home decorator, or front end web designer. You could use one of the many color apps mentioned in the article 25 Popular Color Scheme and Palette Generators on CSSJuice. If some of these items aren’t in your toolbox (be it professional or novice), then you are completely missing the boat. Perhaps as little as three years ago, many of their desktop application equivalents would have costs hundreds of dollars. Typically most of these apps will run in almost any modern web browser. I have listed a group of various apps along with their categorization below. Try them out and tell me what you think of them. You may want to search the particular app name on Youtube for instructions on some of them since not all apps are well documented. If you have any additional ones you would like to share, I will gladly append this list.

Please tell me why (at least in the U.S.) we don't go á la carte on everything, especially services. I cannot possibly watch more than one television/movie at a time. So why does my local cable/satellite provider think I would be interested in more that 10 channels to choose from. I don't need 500. In truth, I don't even need 10. Perhaps they just don't get it. I know that there are many indecisive people in the world and variety is the spice of life. Allow me to pay for just the content I use and I will be a super happy camper. Even the mobile phone companies have come to this decision (albeit a bit reluctantly). They almost all offer Pay As You Go plans, meaning you only pay for the services/data you use. All the old legacy plans are still available for those that want it, but I just think this is a much more feasible way to go. iTunes got it right out of the box. If a musician/artist has not made 12 great songs on a CD to enjoy, then why should the buying audience have to buy the entire disc to hear the one track that they do like. The record industry had been fleecing us for years. There are many other examples I can name, but what a wonderful world this would be.

Preface

All that I am about to say is based on running iOS 5.0.1 on the 2011 iPod Touch w/ 32 GB flash RAM. No phone features will be covered in this article since I personally do not own an iPhone, hence no Siri goodies.
 
System Settings

The System Settings have had a few significant improvements. Most notable is the notifications settings. Many apps allow you to choose the alert style you receive on the device (banners, alerts. or none). Badge notifiers can be enabled/disabled and also choose the number of recent items as well (even in locked mode). This is all set per application. Which means you have a great deal of  customization that can be performed.

App Switching

One of the most elegant features of the iOS is the ability to switch to previously used apps. If you double tap the home button, it will reveal a list of the last four applications you’ve used. That comes in really handy when you have dozens of apps (especially when the apps are in subfolders). What makes this even better is that if you swipe this list to the right you can access the music controller icons. Swipe again to the right and control the volume. If you swipe to the left you begin to see list of previous used apps in groups of four with each successive swipe. The last used app immediately populates to the top of the stack and will appear as the leftmost icon. I absolutely love this feature.

Snapshots

Pressing the home and power buttons simultaneously, creates a snapshot of the current screen 

Wireless Sync

Should your USB connection ever fail, you can still sync using a wireless option now available. This is certainly not the most efficient way of syncing, but it is an available option.

Text Selection

If you highlight text anywhere on your device, not only can you do the conventional cut/copy/paste options, but you can also have iOS speak the highlighted text or define the word from its built-in dictionary. A really practical gem in my opinion. This menu is context sensitive according to the app. For example, a book reading app may give you additional capabilities such as cross references or bookmarking a word/phrase.

Here are some of the images I took last night. I hope you like them.

In our busy lives, we tend to take so many things for granted - even the air we breathe. I challenge you to take 5 minutes out of your day to discover all the beauty that surrounds you.  

❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧ Enjoy the journey ❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧❧ 

Here is the good and the bad about Apple’s new OS (10.7) Lion. 

Airdrop

Available on some hardware platforms only. I found this feature (or the lack thereof) one that I was greatly looking forward to. While it is available for my late 2008 MacBook Pro, it isn’t available for my 2007 Intel based DualQuad processing MacPro. That was a major disappointment. Therefore, I have to resort to using either Dropbox, SpyderOak, SugarSync, or Live Mesh (a 3rd party file sync/share option) or turn on Apple’s file sharing to share between devices on my network.

Scrolling

The default setting for scrolling makes the assumption you are using a trackpad device or magic mouse. A smarter option would be for the OS to determine the input devices available and then assign a default behavior. If there is no trackpad or magic mouse, leave the default setting as before. I understand that Apple wants to push us forward (which is good in most instances). I can accept it and adapt, but I am more of a rare exception than the norm.

Launchpad

If you own any IOS devices (iPad/iPhone/iTouch), then you’ve experienced this swipe to find navigation system. Again this works perfectly on a magic mouse or trackpad, but there are still quite a few Apple users that aren’t in that world as of yet. Granted, you can use the directional keys on your keyboard or conventional mouse to navigate pages. It just may not be as obvious to the user that this is the way it should be done.

Mission Control

I think Apple may have just combined two previous features, renamed it and added a little polish. I don’t know if this can truly be called new, but it is one the features they tout in the new OS.

Apple Profiler

Much kudos is given to Apple for their redesign of the System Profiler app. Even a novice can more easily navigate its tabs and report system info to someone trouble shooting an issue.

Distribution

Horrible. Even with a broad pipeline, it effectively takes hours to upgrade your system from Snow Leopard to Lion.

Cost

The cost to update is nominal especially considering that you can upgrade up to 5 devices for less than $30 US.

Upgrades/Misc

Some of your older applications may not work after updating to the new architecture. Check your manufacturers website for compatibility and update to the latest versions if possible.

Conclusion

There are some features you will probably find indispensable in this new release, but unless you absolutely have a feature that you can not live without, I would advise caution and wait until the 10.7.2 release candidate appears.